Keep the faith
by X.Devils-Sweetheart.X
Summary: "Not many people last long in our job, Stell, without some kind of illogical faith" mac/Stella friendship


It'd been one of those days. Again. Stella held her cup of coffee as if her life depended on it. Her were knuckles a ghostly white as a result. The papers scattered around her desk gave a hint as to the turmoil in her mind. It was a heavy knock on the door that dragged her out of her thoughts.

"Come in," she said, her mind not really being able to focus on anything apart from the case.

"Stell," a familiar voice greeted her. "You should go home." Mac continued after a brief pause.

"Later… I should finish up the paperwork." She gestured loosely to the mass of papers, in the hope that he would believe her. She dragged her eyes up to meet his and was met with a steely gaze.

"You're going to turn into me if you keep up like this." He commented, moving with a sudden speed towards her desk. Within a couple of moments he had scooped up all of the loose documents and stacked them neatly. "The case is over, the paperwork can wait." He walked around to the other side of the desk and gently lifted Stella up.

"But-" she weakly protested, knowing full well that he could probably smell the un-Stella like weakness on her, like a shark could smell blood in the water.

Mac lifted the cup out of the female detectives hand and rested it on her desk. "Your coffee is also cold. Come on. You need a break."

Knowing that any form of argument was futile Stella let Mac lead her out of her office and towards his. "I know how to look after myself, I can cope." She protested.

Mac allowed a small chuckle escape his mouth. "Stella's coming back already?" he asked, half expecting a slap in return. "I know you can, when you want to, when you feel like you deserve it. But when you feel like you don't deserve to look after yourself, that's when I do. That's why I am here. That is why I will always be here for you." His blue eyes met her green ones as they reached his office door. Any hint of humor that had been in his eyes prior to his comment had been replaced by wholehearted honesty. "You forget sometimes," he started as he opened the door and guided her into the room. "That the victims are dead now, and you are not."

"It was my fault. If I had just-"

Mac held a hand up to silence her. "Don't. When you start thinking like that, you're already gone." He led her to the couch and sat her down. "That's why we don't let the public get involved. They get hurt or they get killed. We can't do anything about it if they choose not to listen to us. That's just the way it is." He explained walking to his desk and grabbing the bottle of fruit juice on it before handing it to Stella. "Coffee dehydrates you." He added with a shrug as he sat down next to her.

"But she was innocent in all of this, she hadn't done anything." Stella stressed as she opened the bottle and took a sip obediently.

The male detective put his arm around her and pulled her close. "Stell, we've done this job long enough to know that good people die. Innocent people are no safer than those with the dirtiest hands. We can't save everyone." He breathed in and allowed his senses to be overwhelmed by the cherry smell that came from Stella's hair.

"How do you deal with it?" Stella asked allowing herself to relax, her head seeking comfort on Mac's chest.

A couple of seconds passed before he answered, "I have faith."

"In what?"

"God." He answered with no hesitation this time.

Stella lifted her head and turned so that she was facing him. "How could you believe in a God that allows innocent people to die?"

Mac nodded, as if he were taking in her question and digesting it. "I guess I've got to believe that he needs them more than we do. I need to keep the faith that he's taking them away from this world for a solid purpose. That he needs them for a job that only they can do. I've got to believe that."

Stella froze. He was supposed to be a man of science and he was putting his faith behind something he had no evidence for – to anyone who didn't know him, that would have sounded crazy. "Is that what you believe about Claire?"

Mac nodded slowly, allowing his eyes to meet hers again. "I have to…"

Stella nodded back before returning her head to his chest. "You're the smartest guy I know, and if you can believe that then I guess I can too."  
"You can't last long in our job without having some kind of illogical faith." He told her, bringing his hand up to stroke her head. "Sleep now, you need it. And I know for a fact that if I leave you alone, you will return to the paperwork." He teased lightly.

"You know me too well Mac Taylor." She replied, closing her eyes. Sleep rushed up to greet her immediately, being the only one thing that knew how long she had gone without it.

"It's my job." He replied softly, leaning his own head back and praying for sleep to greet him just as kindly. But he was not as lucky.


End file.
